UPDATED September 15th 2020. Added a private video at the bottom of this article that reveals how to get them back.
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You have gone through a tough breakup but you're still latching onto some hope.
Maybe, you have already started researching some ways on how you can get them back.
Then, you hear the most gut-wrenching words imaginable:
Your ex says there is no chance of getting back together.
It literally feels like the world is ending.
You feel like there is nothing you can do anymore to save this situation...
Actually, there is.
Your ex's words are not usually final and there ARE some things you can do to save this situation.
Your ex's words can really hurt after a breakup.
Can You Get Your Ex Back?
Wondering the answer to that question? I've created a quiz that will tell definitively if you still have a chance with your ex or if you should consider moving on...
Click this link to take the quiz and find out definitively where you stand...
Ex Says There Is No Chance Of Getting Back Together
This is a tough situation to be in but there are some things you can do.
Now, the truth here is that when you hear these words come out of your ex's mouth, your chances of getting them back aren't looking very good at the moment.
The thing is, you can still work on getting the attraction that faded between you two back.
It's not the end of the world when your ex says there is no chance of getting back together. It just means they are feeling like that right now.
Your ex's feelings are temporary and that's the key here.
What I will say though is this:
If your ex says there is no chance of getting back together, you have probably already committed multiple cardinal sins of relationships.
Perhaps you got too needy? or too jealous?
Or maybe after you broke up, you begged and pleaded your ex to not break up with you.
The things I listed above are huge turn-offs to both men and women.
If they tell you that they will never get back together with you, you have probably already made some big mistakes.
So, when they tell you there's no chance of getting back together, your odds are looking pretty slim but still, it's definitely possible to re-attract them and I've personally seen it happen a dozen of times.
When your ex says things like this it means that they have all lost respect for you. They don't see you as that attractive partner they fell for before and they are most likely angry at you.
Their mind is associating you with really negative emotions right now and you will have to change some things to flip that ship around.
So, now that you have learned why they are feeling this way, I want you to assess this:
Is it actually worth it to you to try to get them back?
Do you actually want them back and miss them deeply or do you just miss being in a relationship with someone and feeling the love and affection of being with someone?
Now, since you are reading this article, I'm going to assume you are absolutely 100% sure that you want to get them back.
If you aren't though, I suggest you just give it time and focus on yourself for a while. Time will take care of things.
You need to make sure that you actually want THEM back instead of wanting a relationship back. There is a big difference between the two.
What They Really Mean When They Say There's No Chance
So, as I already mentioned, the fundamental reason for breakups is a loss of attraction.
Your ex has lost all respect for you and I know it's hard to hear but it's the truth.
You most likely aren't the same person anymore as you were at the beginning of your relationship.
They saw something unattractive in you and then tested how you would react to them miss treating you.
Oh yes, if your ex tells you that there is no chance of getting back together with them, it's a sign that they are actually mad at you.
They probably miss treated you for a while in the later stages of your relationship to see how you would react and then if you didn't do anything about it, it turned them off even more.
Then, once you displayed enough unattractive behavior to them, they got fed up and they are probably thinking that they just wasted their time with you.
They have probably already tested you by miss treating you at the end of your relationship.
I hope you don't take this message the wrong way. You probably know it yourself that you aren't the same person that they fell for anymore.
Some elements in your life have driven you to become less attractive.
Perhaps work got too stressful and you didn't have time for them anymore and you neglected them.
Maybe something else in your life drove you to display something unattractive to them.
What you have to realize here is that you WERE once capable of being a person that they fell for found attractive. That means you CAN do it again.
When your ex says things there is no chance of getting back together, they mean that for the time being.
The same way they told you they love you at the beginning of your relationship, they now tell you that you will never get them back.
Human emotions change and just because they hate your guts right now and want nothing to do with you, doesn't mean things can't change in the future if you put in the work.
You see, your ex won't even think about getting back with the person that you were at the end of your relationship. Why would they?
That's why you need to change some things about you.
If you do manage to change and you really focus on striving to become a better and more attractive version of yourself, your ex can and will fall for you again.
If you change the perception of you in your ex's head, things will change.
So, the bottom line you need to understand here is that when your ex promises to you that they will never take you back, it means they will never take that version of you back.
How Can I Still Get Them Back?
So, if you want to still get them back, you have to understand that you absolutely must stop all contact with them for a while.
Your ex is currently angry at you and they are annoyed by your presence. You need to take a break from them and employ no contact.
No contact is a crucial part of an effective ex-back strategy.
You see, if you are constantly around them, they have no reason to miss you and if your ex misses you, your chances of getting them back skyrocket.
They probably currently feel like they could get you back anytime they wanted. When you disappear completely for a while instead of spamming them with needy texts, you make them feel a sense of loss and also show them that you aren't that easy.
It's time to start striving to become a version of yourself that is once again irresistible to your ex.
The moment you realize that your situation isn't hopeless is the moment you need to take action.
While your ex is currently most likely annoyed by your presence, it doesn't always have to be that way.
When you focus on finding the issues of your relationship and you focus on fixing the things that went wrong, you can turn your situation upside-down.
You stop being needy, you stop being lazy, whatever the case and problem in your relationship was, you need to fix it.
Also, a really really good rule of thumb to follow during this time is this:
Don't try to get them back.
I know... I know the above sounds like the most counter-intuitive statement you have ever heard in your life but hear me out.
Instead of focusing all your energy in getting them back and raising all their defences in the process, focus on improving yourself to the point where you are irresistible to them.
Go to the gym, eat healthier, pick up a new hobby or some new clothes etc.
If you stay in the same old routines and you stay as the exact same person that you were during the end of your relationship, why would they take you back?
You can't expect them to take you back if you are the same person as you were at the end of your relationship.
You need to strive to become the absolute best version of yourself.
If you just stop thinking about getting your ex back and switch your mentality to accepting the breakup and improving yourself, you will have a much better chance of succeeding with them in the future.
Your ex is angry at you right now and nothing you say will make it better. That's why you need to let them cool off by not contacting them for a while.
SEPTEMBER 15TH UPDATE:
So, I wrote this article a year ago already and while I was doing some research to update the information here, I stumbled upon something that I thought would be insanely valuable.
Now, I'm a bit hesitant in sharing this because it can be easily abused to fix the wrong type of relationship so before I give you the video I'm about to share, please agree to something:
ONLY use this if you are absolutely SURE that you want to get them back.
Inside this video you will learn a technique that is going to force your ex to feel so much emotional obsession towards you that they have no other choice but to literally crawl back into your arms if you do everything as you are taught.
I must say this again. Only use this if you are sure about getting them back and building a new and improved relationship.
If you pay attention and follow this video presentation all the way to the end, before you even know it, your ex will be pinning you against your bedroom wall, gazing at you with that look they used to give you, and kissing you like you're the last person they'll ever kiss.
Summary
- When your ex says there is no chance of getting back together, they mean it for the time being.
- They have lost attraction to you and you have most likely committed some cardinal sins of relationships like neediness, jealousy etc
- Right now they are irritated by you so if you want them back you need to employ no contact.
- You shouldn't focus on trying to get them back. You should focus on improving your own life and qualities right now. Eventually, it will happen naturally and they will chase you down.
- During no contact, you should also read the case study I linked above so you can follow in my exact footsteps and really leave no chances to not getting them back.
Anyways, just remember that your ex's words always mean what they are feeling right now, so you still have the opportunity to change things around if you follow the advice on my blog.
Good luck!
thank you so much for this article and the update! I read this article, watched the video and employed the advice and I GOT THEM BACK! Happiest girl in the world right now…
Really warms my heart to hear that!
Amazing update Chris!
Thank you! Hopefully it can help a lot of people out!